STFU Madonna

Almost billionaire Madonna (net-worth $850 million) is a victim of the patriarchy, will never let Men take her Life Force, is adopting another bushel of African children (probably), drinks the blood of Chinese pangolins to stay young (not entirely unlikely), blah, blah, blah. You can read more on sister sites or the breathless Entertainment Press about her latest tweet, but her story remains the same – Madge is Pistoff and wants everyone to know it.

So many things wrong with this pov that other, more thoughtful publications have pointed out, but it comes down to this – Madonna is a rich, weathered bitch who fears becoming old and useless and is playing the victim card. (Well, as “useless” as any rich hag with top floor apartments in Manhattan and London can be).

So instead of tweeting how wrong she is and trolling those Fun Loving Feminists in her corner, we need to look at the Big Picture – namely, how do we poor twangers get a piece of $850 mill? Maybe it’s passing off your GoFundMe account as an anti-mansplaining charity, maybe it’s posing as an adoptable waif who needs an absent mother; maybe you wanna go full Guy Ritchie mode and offer your services as a Cabana Boy. (Pickup some Vaseline at Costco first).

Either way, we’ve got an angry New Yorker socialist who’s out of her fukin mind, and if she gives everything to Maddoff / Lehman Brothers instead of one of us when she sheds her heavily stretched mortal coil, we’ve no-one to blame but ourselves.

Story By: The Mix

Demi-God

Remember when being a rock star meant partying hard, sleeping all day, and dying young? Yeah me neither, but it’s a far cry from today’s pop figures who whine about all the wealth and attention they receive.

No-one who understands music would call Demi Lovato a “rock” star, but she carries some of the trappings – multiple hookups with both sexes, award show screeching, and the inevitable drug overdose. Rather than shaking it off like a Stone or outright dying like Amy Winehouse, Demi is recovering from self-abuse with a “brave” and “honest” documentary about overcoming strokes, evil ex-boyfriends, and jet-lag from traveling the world. (Note how it carries the pretension subtitle “Dancing With The Devil” instead of the more appropriate “I Fuctup”).

Who is this documentary for – other child stars turned millionaire pop whores? Hollywood rich jades? Trailer trash who want to win American Idol and then crash and burn? It’s certainly gonna help her agent, publicist, stylist, videographer, PR team, etc – an army of supportive and well-paid people that your typical opioid addict don’t got.

So excuse us if we don’t shed a fugazy tear for a young woman who’s known nothing but fame and cheddar and press. If her doc is peppered with a 1-800 number for other addicts to get help we’ll back down – until then princess, nurse your wounds, unfriend your dealers, donate to charity, and maybe consider a career outside of victimhood.

Story By: Rolling Stone

WTF VS

While reviewing my stock options in the back of my Rolls on my MacBook FapMaster, I failed to notice the drop in Victoria’s Secret portfolio – in other words, wtf?

Once smooth-jazz posers like Maroon 5 headlined the annual Victoria Secret show in New York we (like most of America) lost interest – although we still dreamt of attending – and would catch up on Youtube, and all the fleshy goodness it subsequently recommended (e.g. Lorena Rae, Maia Cotton, Cindy Bruna, other … topics).

Apparently the women’s apparel company has sunk so low as to be subjected to a Hulu documentary, “The Rise and Fall of Victoria’s Secret”. So this bastion of femininity and women’s empowerment and underwire bras is now being treated in the same breff as the Fyre festival – what a blocker.

Googling VS for information without the pictures is like pancakes without syrup – but seems the old dude who runs it is retiring, MeToo has left its mark, and gorgeous women in tight clothing and LasVegas style wings aren’t in fashion anymore – again, WTF?

Once more we reach out to all Men (and experimental Women) to please do your part to keep this mall-worthy purveyor of soft porn alive. Yes, there is ThirdLove and WearLively filling in the (thigh) gap, but to be honest we’re afraid to click on some of the images; it’s like the dark corners of Fredericks of Hollywood – what happens if we’re NOT up for fetish gear at discount prices?

Next time you’re allowed into a strip-mall (pun!), please go inside and purchase expensive lacy shit to help out Malaysian sweat-shops and western honies of all sizes. Or maybe send an email to your congressman/woman with those cheesy videos of the young girls who’ve just been selected as an Angel – if that doesn’t bring a tear to their eye and a jolt to your rope, nothing can save us.

Story By: Deadline

Big Celebrity Drops

February 22, 2021 | Celebs | Sensai Dani |

What’s a celebrity drop these days without a big ol ass in your face? Here’s Beyonce’s latest ad for Icy Park and Khloe Kardashian trying to sell her Good American shoe line.

All I’m interested in buying after seeing these, are some butt injections and cellulite cream. I’m assuming Jennifer Lopez will be going a similar route to sell her new skin care line. Here, take my money ladies.

Big ass means big money.

Tags: beyonce

Miley Requests a Shaved Chest

February 20, 2021 | Celebs | Sensai Dani |

MMA fighter Julian Marquez has publicly asked Miley Cyrus to be his Valentine. Julian must have been feeling a natural high after winning his UFC match against Maki Pinolo on Sunday and used it to publicly declare his lust for Miley. Maki told reporters ” …this is my time to shine. So Miley Cyrus- will you be my Valentine? Let’s go”

Miley’s persona of the week responded to Julian’s offer, by countering “shave an MC into your chest hair and I am YOURS ❤ ” I guess she’s used to the wax chest Liam Hemsworth.

I would have thought Miley was into hairy chests and smelly armpits.

Tags:

Rush Rush

Rush Hudson Limbaugh III is dead. The radio shrill and conspiracy plugger died of lung cancer this week, not before dumping a long list of complaints and right-wing edicts that litter his online obituary like dog-droppings.

Among Limbaugh’s monumental yarns was “feminism was established so as to allow unattractive women access to the mainstream of society”. No hefty egophile, feminism is about building equality with men – well, at least it was in the murphy 70s, before unsatisfied and listless women adopted the mantle bc lazy. In the 21st century, feminism is all about inflicting homicidal wedgies on men and smashing the patriarchy.

As we pointed out in past diatribes, the male equivalent of a feminist is a mascilinst, which sounds toxic and flooty; and since all men are pigs and only think of themselves wgaf what the term is.

As feministas are blind to men’s interests and morality, this question is rhetorical, but: “what trait can ugly men take advantage of that makes them attractive” to the mainstream? The short answer is money, but that’s not very woke, and won’t play in poor, backward countries liberals are trying to impose newfound Western values upon. If a man has to become more feminine, understanding, feeling to become cory to women that’s not masculinity – that’s becoming Chris Martin.

Feminism in its most superficial form has strived to make fugly women less fugly, no doubt – for men, there’s only hair growth treatments and sux2bu.

In conclusion – the New Woke World will not be judging women by their size, shape, color or appearance anymore – only men.

Story By: NY Times

Kim Kardashian Credits Plant Based Diet for her Cosmetic Procedures!

Obviously I hate the Kardashians as much as the next guy. I think they offer no substance or value to the American people, and if anything are just damaging the morals and values of the modern generation.

The family as a whole puts an importance on fame for nothing, consumerism, while pretending to be real, while being totally manufactured and fake.

Nothing they say is actually true, it’s just low level media manipulation that works, but the people who are sucked into their spell just buy into their lies and the products they are pushing.

So today, I came across an article on a large celebrity gossip site that was praising Kim Kardashians “Itty Bitty Waist” and her “Pretty Face”, because clearly they are on the Kardashian payroll.

They are also trying to credit her PLANT BASED diet for her new “girl going through a divorce” body and are posturing it as a “Take that Kanye, I still got it”, when really it’s face injections and liposuction, photoshop and lies!!!

As a people, we need to stop celebrating the toxic, vapid, morally devoid people who put an importance on fan, follows, likes, conversions, money, because it is massively disgusting and actually not what makes people happy at their core.

Or at least stop buying into Kim’s lies about being plant based and the positive effects of it when she’s probably eating an omelette as her handlers oil fake booty down, or whatever it is they do.

Stop believing the internet and call out the dick suckers sucking up to this nonsense with the “You’re so beautiful” LIES. It is at the point of MENTAL.

The best diet Kim could go on is a hunger strike that doesn’t end.

Jason Derulo is Not Down With The Trans

Jasoooonn DeRuLoOo just got called out for potentially cheating on his current Influencer girlfriend Jena Frumes. Which is kinda typical musician behavior so it’s not really that big of a deal, but the juicy part of this story is the person exposing Jason is Lilah Gibney.

Lilah Gibney is a 20 something trans girl who lives in LA but travels around the world in search of her next sugar daddy, yea she’s that type of girl. She’s also the type of trans girl who thinks that she doesn’t need to be upfront about her transition with the people she hooks up with. Which might be easier now that she has a vagina, I guess. But it wasn’t fine when she was still swinging a dick between those legs. Or at least Jason didn’t think so!

It’s sort of a mans worst nightmare to have the ol’ bait n switch pulled on them, but he covered his ass with a “no disrespect” after letting her know he’s not down with chicks with dicks, which is needed in 2021 because if you get tricked into getting sucked off by a girl who used to be a dude and you’re not ok with it, you’re the enemy!

The singer apparently met up with Lilah after communicating through direct message on Instagram, with Jason inviting her to his studio to connect. Lilah’s vagina is literally only 6 months old, so you really dont have to scroll back too far in her Instagram feed to see full vlogs dedicated to her surgery. Lilah admits that when she met up with Jason, she had yet to have her weiner flipped inside out and such, but goes on to call herself a “fully 100% legal female” as she defends her choice through text to Jason.

If Jason is as Anti-Trans as he’s leading on to be in these DM’s to Lilah, he should probably do a bit more background on a girl that looks like this before he lets her slide into the DMs, or into his booty.

This is also the same person who exposed Lil Wayne for wanting to hook up with her, going so far as to book her a flight, hotel and a driver but that she ultimately decided not to hook up with him because according to her, he has HIV. He has also since blocked her.


Paris Hilton is 40 Years Old and Not Married

February 18, 2021 | Celebs | Sensai Dani |

Paris Hilton was proposed to yesterday by her boyfriend of 15 months Carter Reum. This is her fourth time being engaged. Paris Hilton is forty years old and has never been married. No annulments, no Vegas wedding Britney style, no Pamela Anderson 48 hour later denial, no married at 15 like Aliyah to R. Kelly. She’s never walked down the aisle!

Paris please give us some wedding pics to help us get through the 2020’s. Or have a random baby a la Halsey! Remember when Paris was engaged to a Greek man named Paris? Another rich socialite. It was perfect. Paris loves Paris. Everything made sense then.

Speaking of names, her new fiancé’s brothers name is Courtney.

Tags: paris hilton

Brandi Granville Wants to Be Eaten

February 17, 2021 | Celebs | Sensai Dani |

After watching the Richard Ramirez documentary Night Stalker and seeing how many groupies came out of the woodwork for the psychopathic killer, I just knew disgraced celeb Armie Hammer was going to have his Instagram DM’s flooded. 

Armie is in hot water for his secret cannibalism fetish and for begging his ex’s to surgically remove their ribs for him to eat, among other things.

Someone who is not so shy about being a pervert, is Reality TV celeb Brandi Glanville, who publicly tweeted:

“Dear @armiehammer you can have my ribcage. How do you just keep getting hotter and hotter. #letsbbq” 

At least Armie KNEW to hide it! She quickly deleted this tweet after everyone lost their minds.

Tags: brandi glanville