Pharma Bro gets Some

Not sure where to start on this one – some midwest Good Girl “journalist” has fallen in love with Smug Pharma Phag Martin Shkreli while covering his incarceration, leaving her husband and career behind. Also she photographs well, bc this is Elle reporting and it’s important to know which earrings she’s wearing.

Reading the article is like watching a trainwreck of WASP privilege and sniveling urban greed. There is an Olympic level of delusion, self-importance, and hatred for his/her fellow man on the field here – you could write your psychology thesis on this puff-piece alone. You don’t need to be a quacker to realize Miss Smythe decided at an early age she was Special, that only she can understand a pathological liar and nihilist, and nothing matters but the attention and future special place at the lounge of Media Sensation.

You don’t even wanna know why, or “how could”, or what’s in it for him – especially since their relationship isn’t consummated and as a serial manipulator Shkreli has ghosted her – bc it doesn’t apply. Some small, likely feminist (but probably clinically loco) voice inside this failed fashion designer told her she’s different, he’s different to her, and why not ctrl-alt-del my life based on an unassailable belief and the chance for future coin.

There’s some sort of modern magic cocktail of feminism, immorality, self-promotion, and unwavering greed that allows these people to exist and, more importantly for them, sign 6 figure book / movie deals. You can start casting the thin-lipped, prissy, overtly self-delusional actress to take the role e.g. Gwenyth Paltrow. (No doubt Smythe will become a spokesman for Goop sometime soon).

What shoulda been a heart-warming story of a greedy bracket getting his teeth rearranged is instead about Everything Wrong With Western Society. When Shkreli gets released bc white-collar crime, Big Media will line up at their sensible east-side brownstone by the 100s.

STORY VIA ELLE

Give it All Away

December 21, 2020 | News | Media Man |

It’s important to point to the positive news in the world today with all the shit going down, so let’s do some possimistic leveling up. Ex Jeff Bezos beard MacKenzie Scott has handed out millions to various charities in the US the last 4 months (according to the BBC), with minimal fanfare (until now).

Yes it’s easy to give away billions when you have billions, and sure she’s trying to wash away the stain of being a tyrant’s meat pie, and yes our Amazon Overlords are trying to buy some positive karma; don’t change the fact that she’s got a hand out to several chuggers instead of buying the Worlds Biggest Minivan.

It’s a suxass that we have to point out who amongst the Stinking Rich is actually preoccupied with not taking it with them, unlike Putin and Larry Elison and pedophile Prince Andrew. So many people see Steve Jobs and Gordon Gekko as role models and not the cabron we common people do, hilton’s oblivious to how much will get sucked up by capital gains and lawyer’s fee to contest their will after they dead.

So every penny counts – or every $4.2 billion, which remains a rounding area to ex Jeff. Any person that can get their bank account to $0 before croaking – whatever sole-boner you want – deserves a nod. Keep going MacKenzie.

Story by: BBC

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Female Sexism is Allowed

It may shock many to know that “sexism” is not a feminist term. Due to the efforts of feminists who’ve been given the keys to their little kingdoms, men are discriminated against (e.g. the modeling profession)

Today’s example of selective sexism is Paris mayor Anne Hidalgo, who felt she was being unfairly taken to task for hiring too many women on her civic team (according to the NPR). You know, just like Men used to do – filling the ranks with their male cronies and keeping meddling women out of the backrooms. Except, under the feminista banner, it’s okay to do the exact same thing; and it’s not Sexism.

For those still struggling to understand the term, let’s check with Mr. Webster, who says sexism is “prejudice or discrimination based on sex” (the gender, not the act, pervert). Many women (and some Liberated men) expect the wording to be “against women”; perhaps that’s the definition in the feminut dictionary.

Historically men have been dicks here, and we’re sorry and all that, but it don’t justify Women switching chairs. If you’re hiring practices, club membership, or Pinterest blog mandates avoiding behavior that’s deemed sexist, women don’t get to shift that.

Next chapter will discuss feminista’s interpretation of the word “equality”.



Story by:NPR

What’s French for “Karen”?

Some Feminists are easier to identify than others: can anyone look at the picture of Pascale Cecile Veronique Ferrier – who’s accused of sending poisonous substance to Trump and others – and say, that’s a happy, supportive person who enjoys chilling with men?

The Feminist movement may have had some merit once – we’re thinking mid-70s – but now it’s populated with bitter, unfulfilled, delusional women who assume Men are responsible for their ignorance and lack of direction. Key traits include a strong sense of unearned entitlement, self-righteous behavior, and hatred for any man who impedes them, whether lawful or not.

Which fit domestic terrorist Ferrier, who’s going back to jail in Texas bc patriarchy (and she tried to kill a few peeps), and good luck finding a sympathetic ear for your liberal cause there Karen.

You can read her letters to understand why this misguided pab qualified for the femista army, as she’s 1) disorganized 2) uses butchered English and 3) thinks she’s funny when she’s sarcastic. This self-proclaimed “Free Rebel Spirit” would be quick to support arson and torture if it served their Greater Purpose.

And finally, and obviously – why do militant feminists never look like Cameron Dove or Megan Fox (or Rose McGowan)? Not that we’re questioning her sexual orientation, but if you Google the phrase “lesbian criminal”, her mug-shot would make the top 10.

People from all over the world send threatening letters to the US president – it takes a special person to feel they are justified in doing so. This Karen wants to kill the Manager.

Story by CBS

Let’s Not Get Carried Away

Congrats to Vanderbilt place-kicker Sarah Fuller, who kicked at PAT in a “Power 5” college football game on Saturday. It’s a testament to how far women athletes have come that she can compete in a nationally broadcast football game.

Also, as Big Media is afraid to say, she’s the substitute kicker for the 0-9 Commodores, a team who rarely scores and wouldn’t put her on the field except for the Stupid Virus. She wasn’t the first, second, or third choice for the position, and although she can kick a (soccer) ball a shton, she’s also not the first woman to play collegiate men’s football.

Among the plays that Miss Fuller didn’t provide, that are typically expected in a football game: running with the ball, passing the ball, blocking, tackling, running a route, hiking the ball, catching a ball … and so-on. Maybe she brought her own tee.

Not sure how to say this without sounding like an asshole, but “I just want to tell all the girls out there that you can do anything you set your mind to” is misleading. That would be an Incorrect Answer on an SAT exam (depending on how Liberal colleges get) for a number of reasons, the most pertinent being on the aforementioned football field, where no-one born female has ever tackled, thrown, run, blocked, or caught a football in a “Power 5” game.

Until they stop keeping score on Crimson Tide games and Vegas loses interest in betting on sports, reality will dictate that women will struggle to play football, basketball, hockey, etc. at a professional level. (Notice we didn’t say “baseball” – not sure how those doughboys get millions to stand around for 90% of the game). There are some impressive soccer-playing women on the pitch nowadays, but last I checked the Premier League, Bundesliga, La Liga, MLS … you get what we’re pitching (pun!).

Tell your daughter / niece / first crush that she will achieve great things and she should practice hard and kick ass across Hell’s Half-Acre – but maybe setting her mind to be starting linebacker in the Superbowl can be Plan B.

Story by CBS Sports

Slut Gets Paid

Here’s a story we all need to get behind – New York paramedic Lauren Kwei has been outed as an OnlyFans contributor, looking to supplant her meager healthcare income; and subsequently the New York Post is accused of slut-shaming her for doing so. There are two immutable, eternal truths at play here: 1) the New York Post slings shit, and 2) women can get paid for removing their clothes.

TGFSF that we live in a world where liberated biddies can survive based on hard-work, training, and the propensity to pose naked. (I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t want to live in a world where that wasn’t possible.)

It would suck if we westerners had to force someone attractive to shovel snow, hand out hamburgers, or clean Motel 6’s – seriously. It could be a lot worse – outside of these Blessed United States, pover women have resorted to prostitution, drug peddling, or inflaming self-righteous liberals on social media just to earn enough money to eat rice.

It should be obvious that OnlyFans is like the Salvation Army for hot zeldas – they are doing society a favor by allowing this outlay of donations to the poor babes, and we in turn are saving these smoking waifs from a life of poverty or degradation or worse.

This Christmas season, give a moment to think about the hard-working paramedics that are saving this country from ruin, and sign-up at your local OnlyFans site. Or go to her GoFundMe page – It’s the everett thing to do.

Story by The Wrap

Brooke Henderson Is the Answer

We Men spend too much time judging a woman by her physical portfolio instead of her financial one – as you get older, you become more interested in getting your hands on her Bitcoins as opposed to other assets (tee-hee). Unlike her presently perky puppies, your gf shares in Tesla or Apple will always go up.

The obvious solution is to find both, and thus we turn to golf goddess Brooke Henderson. When she tees off at the US Open this weekend, keep her LPGA earnings in mind when you watch her flade into the clubhouse.

We all know who Paige Spiranic is, and Instagram is littered with “professional golfers” like Genevieve Madison and Eleonora Incardona whose swing looks like a constipated gorilla holding a hockey stick. Follow if you must, but what happens when their Gram followers drop as they turn into Madonna?

Henderson is caf, rich, ambitious, and athletic – well, as athletic as golfers get e.g. she’s not gonna out-bench Serena. She’s Canadian, so she knows what suffering is, and her stroke will keep her on the tour for years. She may be the Most Desirable Woman on the planet.

We don’t want some self-obsessed Kardashian who sleeps all day and can’t drive a stick – give us someone who gets up early and makes a healthy breakfast. I’d be like “what can I do to keep you making bank – rub your shoulders? Fly with you to Phoenix to practice your swing?” I don’t care if she can hit the ball 100 yards farther than me – if doing the dishes means your hands can sink a 40 ft putt for a quarter million, give me an apron.

Wendy Williams is Better Than Us

I hope someday to have enough money and ego to produce a biopic on myself – just like “Wendy Williams: The Movie” (no really, that’s the title). Normally Hollywood waits until famous people are dead – or a least worthy – before lionizing them on celluloid, but Williams figured, who better to tell the world how wonderful she is than her?

My biopic would be similar to hers, tracing my journey from humble beginnings to East Coast stardom, casting someone attractive as me, and several budding models as those who broke our hearts through the years. The story is full of loss and redemption, but her’s would be rife with emotional poverty, as opposed to my actual poverty. We’ll both skip the unsavory parts – like when I set a hobo on fire, dabbled in heroin, or got beat up for saying shocking, truthful things – just like Williams. Those things just don’t make for good television anyway.

There’s no doubt her egoboo will feature a heroic and insightful recovery from (minor) drugs, victories over sexist / racist / greedy detractors, and the shame of once voting Republican. Producers are no-doubt thankful for past photogenic moments where Williams wore wearing low-cut blouses while on radio, shocked professional athletes, and fainted while dressed as the Statue-of-Liberty; that’ll help give the fictional bits more weight.

Because producing a movie on your life story is the best way to show William’s life has been Well Lived, while yours and mine are nerpy. It’s important for us subordinates to realize how she too has overcome suffering – e.g. once her stylist put her wig on crooked – but I bet her TV classmates won’t have facial cars or needle marks like yours and mine. Through close-ups, and rising music, a braw actress representing Williams will humbly illustrate her triumphs and unfaltering success – my most exciting moment is once getting free fries at Burger King.

In the future, should Wendy die in a tragic yachting accident, they can add a new ending with cut scenes of a nation morning, soft piano music, and an angelic Williams looking down on us mortals – featuring a younger, firmer version of herself or course.

STORY from TheWrap

Hollywood Signals Left, Cashes in on the Right

One thing is for certain in the new Hollywood paradigm – diversity, inclusion, and non-judgemental stories are the future for movies, television, and video-games. The filming industry in particular – movies, TV, streaming – is kicking successful productions that celebrate LGBTQ-nicity, BLM, feminism, and whatever cause-dujour Big Media is currently outraged about.

Except it’s not, and Variety, for one knows that – check their report on the top 20 “entertainment franchises”, from surveys of 350K assumedly normal people. There’s some obvious bank here: “Avengers”, “Stranger Things”, “Star Wars” (well, “The Mandalorian”), more superheroes; if you skim down the list looking for the thick popularity of woke films blowing fashionable social causes … keep scanning.

There’s a white male NRA wet-dream (“John Wick”), an eastern-European infused fantasy (“The Witcher”), and a smart-ass Canadian pretty boy (“Deadpool”). Sure there’s “Black Panther” and “Black Widow” (not related harhar), and if you squint at them hard enough you might see something other than Another Superhero Movie – but for some reason 2017 Best Picture “Moonlight” isn’t on the list.

WWTDD is happy to support shows featuring diverse genders, skin colors, and sneaky progressivism; maybe even a pinch of liberal wish-fulfillment (e.g. “Avatar”). And yes, Rich White Men have run Hollywood for too long e.g. we could use more Bela Bajaria (Google).

With the left hand Hollywood servers gender fluidity and liberal outage, and with its right it’s red meat sprinkled with white privilege. Guess which hand turns the most tricks.

Story and List via VARIETY

How about 67 pics of Scarlett Johansson from our Archive to celebrate the Avengers being the most WOKE, or watched movie of the year.

How to Transition, by E. Page

Here’s some pointers to consider before you undertake a gender transition:

1. Announce on Instagram

2. Choose a cutesy name that coyly reflects your birth name; bc although transitioning to another gender is the most important decision in your life, and has a drastic impact on the lives of your family and friends, that doesn’t mean it can’t be ironic and fun

3. Underline your newfound masculinity by wearing a trucker hat

4. Let your employers know that you expect to return to the roles you held before the transition – even if you were hired for a particular appearance or skill-set that you’ve now lost (e.g. the ability to appreciate women’s basketball). You’re making a big change in your life, it’s only fair that the world changes itself around you

5. Tell everyone how happy you are – as opposed to any happiness you previously expressed through years of social media, rocking a different gender, which apparently wasn’t TRUE happiness, but now it is

6. Reinforce how discrimination for your new gender, or the transition itself, is rampant so you are instantly victim and potential savior to your new tribe

Because nothing says you stand for something like whining about it on the day you land. Maybe it’s like coming out as a Browns fan, that you feel the need to apologize and conversely throw-down with any detractors the moment you convert.

There must be a way to do this with grace and humility, but that may be too much to ask of an attention-seeking solipsist. The Wachowskis transitioned without a press release, and if the 4th Matrix movie she’s directing is even half as good as the first, no-one will give a ff whether she sits or