If you don’t get killed in Europe by the the local baker radicalized at the corner mosque, you’re set to experience some stellar travel deals. Thanks to the massive swell of jihadists ushered into Europe’s major cities and a few limbless bloody bodies later, tourism from the U.S. to Europe has dropped dramatically. That bloody Sharia cloud has a silver lining in airlines dropping fares for American travelers to go visit the Old Country and its extensive metal detectors. You can do roundtrip to European capitals for $350 or less. Fly from L.A. to Paris for less than you can to Kansas City. The BBQ is better in K.C. But you’ll miss the No Go Zones. Both places eschew pork.
Similar patterns developed in travel deals to Mexico several years back when cartel leaders started cramping the tourism teade by hanging severed heads on freeway overpasses in Acapulco. That shit was supposed to be kept on the down low. Like family secrets you don’t air for guests. We don’t even talk about Uncle Ralph anymore, not since prison. If you don’t mind the small chance of being caught in a narco gun battle, the deals to Puerto Vallarta are downright sinister.
America does a better job of keeping its violent underbelly contained to non-tourist spots. Like Detroit. Thousand of people are being killed in the designated shitty neighborhoods of Chicago. Zero on the Miracle Mile. No Crips attacks on Rodeo Drive. That’s a solid eight miles away and out of gunshot range. You can’t stop the random nut job or Twitter motivated jihadist from shooting up a place every now and then. It’s when you invite in fifty thousand of those guys to non-assimilate in your fair city that your inbound airfares are going to plummet.
It’s hard for many people to accept that for all the U.S.’s shortcomings, we’re still terrifically better off than Europe. It’s some weird nostalgia or fairy tale political idealism. Most everybody would agree we’re extremely better off than Syria and Europe is now merely Syria, with better restaurant options.
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